Daughter (who shall remain nameless): Where’s Daddy tonight?
Daughter: (who needs to remain nameless) Oh that’s in Germany isn’t it?
Me: ??????? No, darling …
Daughter: Oh of course, silly me, I meant Amsterdam is in Germany.
Me: !!!!!!! No poppet – Aberdeen is in Scotland and Amsterdam is in Holland.
Daughter (who really shall remain nameless): No mummy you’re just saying that so I look stupid!
Me: No, seriously, darling, you’re doing a really grand job of that yourself
… just saying!